R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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