i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
