He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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