like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
