Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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