Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
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