Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
