thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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