someone get that fucking seahorse.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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