Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
