Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
