I don't remember. Are we still dating?
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize