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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw

  (281): View more from Texas

  I love Texas.

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs

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• (727): View more from Florida

  I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.

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• (315): View more from New York

  Hello wreck, this is your train calling.

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.

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• (501): View more from Arkansas

  You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.

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• (813): View more from Florida

  FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Yeah, why?

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries

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