SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
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