Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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