how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
