Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Randomize
