Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
