? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Randomize