I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
