so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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