similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize
