remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
