I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
She told me I should be a condom model.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
