Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize
