It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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