There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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