ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
