lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
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