Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize