sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
