I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
