The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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