Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
