I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize