I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Randomize
