found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
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