The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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