How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
