Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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