question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
