haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Randomize
