I puked a lego.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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