did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
