I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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