Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
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