We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
