And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Why can't burritos get me drunk
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
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