You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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