I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
we should paint friendship bongs
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
