Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
